Tuesday, October 2, 2007

Laptop-using-while-driving douchesack totally gets pwn3d, and I love it

If there is one trend I have come to loathe with a burning passion that summons the bile from deep within my system, it is the tools who insist on viewing screens of portable devices (laptops, DVD players, phones, GPS, etc.) while driving. It is obnoxious, it is unsafe, and it is the very height of behavior that deserves a good solid cockpunching. Most frustratingly, there is rarely anything you can do about these hosebags. They speed by, their radio blasting out the window (and 9 times out of 10 it is that execrable "Hey there Delilah" song), and you just sit there with nothing to do but shake your fast and make snarky comments about their totally pimped out VW Golf.

Today, however, Portland's KATU news brings us the heartwarming story of a local tool who was so distracted by the contents of his laptop computer (guesses as to said content? Porn? The latest James Blunt video? "The Hills" recap on Television Without Pity?) that he failed to make note of the multi-ton large yellow schoolbus suddenly stopped directly in front of him. Faster than you can say "Whoomp! There it is!" said tool impacted said schoolbus, driving the bumper of his Mercedes into the backseat, and sending him to the hospital. This photo exists as lovely schadenfreude for all of us who have suffered in the presence of these jackasses.